Things I've learned from "Thud"

1. Shiny Shine is good.

2. You don't need an axe to be a dwarf.

3. Do not get in Commander Vimes' way at 5 til 6.

3a. Just don't.

4. "Where's My Cow?" is the greatest work of literature in the Discworld.

4a. If you don't believe me, ask Young Sam.

4b. If you still don't believe me, ask Old Sam. Then run. Quickly.

Finally.

5. Do. Not. Fuck. With. Vimes.

EVER.