jeriendhal | 18 hours to RotK Premiere Drabble

Wierd Interlude: I had an idea for a webcomic in running through my head once. Orlando Bloom participates in one X-Treme sport too many while filming LotR and ends up in a coma. When he awakens fifty years later, he discovers that the New Zealand govt. figured out that ancillary costs for LotR made up 10% of the country's GNP. Therefore around 2003 they passed a law making it actually illegal to *stop* filming LotR, which is still going on 50 years later.

Memorable quotes:

(In 2003)
Reporter: Well, I can imagine finishing this film must be a relief,
Peter.
Peter Jackson: Well, I don't know about a relief. How do you mean?
Reporter: Just imagine how terrible it would be if one of your key
actors had died in the middle of filming.
PJ: Oh, that wasn't likely to happen. Everybody here knows to be
careful...
(Orlando Bloom zips through the frame on a skateboard, in costume.)
Orlando: Waaaaaahoooooo!
PJ: Orlando! Mind the bus!
CRUNCH!
PJ: And that crane!
SMASH!
PJ: And that building being demolished!
BOOM!
PJ (to reporter): If you don't mind, I've got to pop on home and
shoot myself...

(Orlando wakes up with a really old hobbit sitting beside him.)
Orlando: Ian?
Sean Astin: Uh, no. Look, Orlando, we need to talk.

(explaining things)
Sean: So in 2003, Parliment made it illegal for us to stop filming.
Orlando: How did everyone react?
Sean: Well, some of us took it better than others.
(Sean Bean is being dragged across the studio by two burly security guards)
Bean: No! I don't wanna do anymore ADR! You can't make me!
Sean: Quit being a baby, Sean!

(They bump into a remarkably well preserved Christopher Lee)
Orlando: Wow, Christopher, you haven't changed a bit. How did you age so well?
Christopher: Well, I didn't do all those Dracula films for Hammer without learning a secret or two. (smiles)
Orlando: Your kidding. He's kidding, right Sean?
Sean: We don't ask...