Feb. 22nd, 2017

jeriendhal: (Wazagan)
A short little scene from my unwritten Batman '42 serial script that's been brewing in my head, riffing off the original really, really racist and awful WWII era Batman serial.

With apologies to [livejournal.com profile] siderea for having a character do a psychological analysis without directly interviewing the subject...

* * *

SCENE: In the Joker’s lair after his latest defeat by Batman.

Joker: I can’t believe it! Who does Batman think he is, anyway?

Harley: Pewsonally I think he’s Bruce Wayne.

Joker: (blinks in surprise) How’dya figure that one?

Harley: Well think about it. Batman has that car and all those fancy gadgets, and the martial arts training. Bruce Wayne has the money t’ pay that sort of thing, and he disappeared into the Orient for several years, plus he likely suffers from deep-seated trauma and possibly a psychotic break due to his witnessing the murder of his parents at a young age. I’d also conjecture that he has deep-seated issues with his sexuality, what with never marrying and the string of girlfriends he never seems to get past second base with, and the fact that Batman runs around all night wearing a black rubber suit.

(BEAT, as everyone in the room stares at her like she’s grown a second head)

What? I am a certified psychologist, after all.

Joker: (looking uncomfortable) When you put it that way, that makes his relationship with the Boy Wonder a bit disturbing.

Harley: Not necessarily. Given Batman’s usual reaction to sexual abusers, I’d conjecture that their relationship is strictly platonic, with any feelings in that direction severely repressed.

(Joker looks at her cross-eyed for a LONG BEAT)

Joker: (exaggerated patience): Harley dear, why don’t you go feed the hyenas?

Harley: Okay! Tra-la-la-la-la!

(she skips cheerily out of the room.)

Joker: Harley thinks Bruce Wayne is Batman? Sheesh! Sometimes that girl makes me look normal!

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