CotRV: Thursday Morning Quarterbacking

[jeriendhal]

Re-reading the conclusion again, I can't help but think I'm going to end up revising it a bit before long. At least three people have commented to me that they felt sorry for Countess Highglider in the end, which was not the effect I was originally going. One of the commentators even said as much, telling me by making her sympathetic in breakdown it undercut her villiany, which I'm afraid I have to agree with. That and I think I made a strategic mistake in keeping Mel and Rolas seperate and essentially passive observers during the court, which forced the focus off of them and onto Highglider, which made the situation worse. Might have to outline an alternative and write it up eventually. For now I'm going to take a writing break until Monday, then get started on revising "Andrea's Story".

Comments

[barbara-the-w.livejournal.com]

making her sympathetic in breakdown it undercut her villiany

I have to disagree with this particular part, although I concur about relegating Melika and Rolas to spectators in this penultimate scene sucks the wind outta the sails.

Making Highglider's breakdown sympathetic made her more real, more possible. This is the way the mad look at the world... in their own minds, they are the heroes, not the villians of the story. And I liked that.

So feedback from the other side :)